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Toddler at the Movies

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Going to the movies is probably on everyone’s list of favorite things to do. I mean why would anyone not like going? The comfy bucket seats that recline, the large screen, loud sound, smell of popcorn, sharing a yummy snack, the good company, and just getting lost in the movie are all great reasons to always go. As much as I love the movies I don’t really get the chance to go that often anymore. It’s so difficult to find a sitter and plant the whole night out, the process itself is exhausting so I just choose to not go. So that fun past time has been put on the back burner as a mom.

Well today I took a chance! I took my toddler to the movies. I’m not exactly sure what the right age is to bring a toddler to the movie but I figured it was worth a shot. Brayden will be three in May…. when did you take your toddler?

I was really excited to give this a try because it’s just another thing we could do together if he liked it. I went in with absolutely no expectations that he would make it through the 90 minute movie given that it was noon and that’s usually leading up to nap time. So let me just tell you how amazing it was to see the look on his face! The ticket cashier only made it more exciting for Brayden. She handed him the tickets and then said ok go hand them to the guy over there. When the gentleman checked our tickets he did the same thing and spoke directly to Brayden, the grin on his face was a mile wide. He couldn’t be happier and he felt like such a big boy.

When we walked in to the theater room his first reaction was “wow” he was amazed at how big the screen was. The Theater was empty! Thank god for that! Between the screen size and how loud the sound was he was just laughing and smiling the whole time. We made it through the previews (not without a few fidgety movements) and about 30 mins of the movie before he kept saying “mommy outside”. I kept trying to get him to sit on my lap to see if he would last a little longer. He would sit for like 30 seconds and then go back to his seat and say outside outside. I’m come to the conclusion that unless a movie is going through full action scenes or funny commentary that the understands he won’t last. At home he watches Zootopia and Hotel Transylvania from start to finish without fail. I’ll never know how the movie ended today but at least he had fun for a little while.

Should I try again? is two & half to young for the movies? Moms what advice do you have for me?

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Best Pants Ever

Fashion is one of the many things I love in life! I worked in the fashion industry for 5 years before I moved on. Some of the perks of working in fashion: You get to learn how to tailor style to who you are, you learn what looks best on your body type and others, you learn that mixing patters is ok and actually a great thing, being daring is half the fun and well the discount isn’t too bad. The cons of working in fashion: lets just say you spend too much and you well run out of room in your closet.

When I found out I was pregnant nothing changed as far as my fashion. I made sure to shop frequently and try multiple styles to see what looked best. I didn’t care about spending the money to only use for a short time (I probably should have) and I had a blast dressing my bump. Then I made sure to promise myself.. I will not look like a mom after becoming one. I didn’t want to have classic mom style. You know what I mean: ill fighting pants, too large tops, and  no accessories to dress it up. My I guess what you would call a problem has yet to diminish. I’m even more of sucker now! How so? Well because I have a little one now I don’t want to go to the store as much because it just sucks to put him in a car seat, pull him out of the car seat, put him in a stroller, and have him get fussy. So I have become more of an online shopper. So in the comfort of my own home I get look at various outfits from various stores. Its even worse when they have emailed me a coupon and tell me that its a % off. You get me the minute there are savings… I guess it is a problem at this point.

Anyways I want to talk about these pants I bought! Now I have a difficult time buying pants. I’m about 5’2″ 127lbs and I carry all of my weight on my ass and hips. So needless to saying buying pants just fucking sucks. They are either too tight on the bottom and gaping at the top or just big all around. Any woman with a pear shape will know exactly what I’m talking about! So I found these pants at the Loft. I don’t normally shop there but ever since The Limited went bankrupt and closed I don’t have a favorite store so I figured I would try them out. They are called skinny cropped chinos and they come in amazing beautiful colors for spring that you can start wearing now. They run a bit large so I did have to go down a size! Can I get three cheers for vanity sizing please? Hip Hip Hooray!!!! They are extremely soft and comfortable. I would classify them under the business casual category because I could defienetly wear them with some Kids when I’m not at work but wear a pair of cute booties and jacket to go with it at work! They are only $59.50 so with a coupon or special going on you can get them at a great price. I bought them in 4 colors Fresh green, Pink fizz, Castlerock, and Vivid blush. I actually just ordered two cute peep toe booties from DSW to wear with these pants to work!

Pictures of the pants below! 

Way to go Loft! Keep them coming in every color possible! And for all the ladies out there I highly recommend adding these to your spring wardrobe.

 

 

 

 

*in no way shape or form is this a paid advertisement of the Loft. I just fell in love with these pants and I know how difficult pant shopping can be for women*

Stay a home vs Working

I had the luxury of taking some time off this week. I don’t go back to work until Monday. This time off was much needed. 2016 was one of the most challenging and exhausting years both professionally and personally. When we experience those types of years we are forced to learn, grow, develop and evolve into someone else. So needless to say I’m so pumped to have 9 days off to relax, spend time with my son, clean up the house a bit since it gets neglected and work on some writing. Did I just say I’ll be relaxing? Ha Ha apparently I turned into a comedian.

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It’s funny how there’s always the debate of which moms have it worse. Do working moms have it worse? Do stay at home moms have it worse? Well let’s just say I think we all have it bad. I’ve only been off for 3 days in a row now and I’m exhausted! I completely feel the same way I do when I am working 9+ hour days. It’s not like I’m sleeping in, drinking mimosas and reading by the ocean all day. Doesn’t that sound amazing? I would give anything to have that be my time off for even just a day. The reality is I’m still up a 5:30 am with a toddler that wants to pretend he’s Captain America while I have to be Iron Man. This pretend play involves a lot of running around and falling to the ground if I’ve been injured during combat. At least he’s giving me my work out! On the flip side listening to his demands is not only hilarious but a little annoying when it changes every minute. Can I also just ask since when do toddlers have the right to make demands? “Momma watch Pj Masks” “Momma watch Captain America” Momma chips” Momma apple Juice” Momma chicken nuggets” I think you get the picture, toddlers ask a lot of us. I’ve gone from manager to slave for a week!

Lets go to the next topic… are all toddlers bipolar or is this unique to my own little love bug? One minute he is happy as can be and then next minute he is throwing his baby (security blanket that has an elephant head) across the room. For the record he doesn’t just thrown one baby, he throws all seven that he has to keep at his side at all times. You can imagine how difficult it is to travel with seven security blankets! When those bipolar moments occur I can’t help but laugh uncontrollably which probably makes it worse but it is seriously the funniest thing to witness.

I don’t think any of us truly ever get a break! So why do we argue about who has worst? I think there are pros and cons to both situations. If I could be home with my child all the time I would just get to spend more time with him and hopefully build even tighter bond. But if I was home all the time I would probably go mad, my drive time to work is my relaxing time. Being a full time working mom is rewarding if you love your job and it takes you out of mom mode for even just a few hours. On the flip side you miss the most precious moments of your children’s development and you leave them in the hands of others.

As I have started to blog more I notice a consistent theme in my writing. No matter what the story theme is I some how always manage to write that we women just need to support each other instead of bring each other down. Now more than ever we need to become united and fight for how we want to be viewed and that can’t happen until we stop bashing each other.

Have a great day to all you beautiful women out there! Lets start the week by kicking some ass today!

Are you a Chameleon ? 

Chameleon: a lizard that can change its color to match its surroundings.

 

How often do you change your look? If you do change your look often what exactly do you change? Is it your hair, make up or outfits?

Changing your look is fun, but also it’s a journey of self discovery. When you change something on the outside it’s typically because you want to try something different or are expressing a particular way you are feeling on the inside.

From short pixie cut hair to longer purple hair I have done it all. Not only has my hair been a reflection of someone else I want to be in that moment but every day my outfit style changes along with my makeup.

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Getting ready in the morning is a project every day. It always comes down to who I want to be on the outside. I’m sure that sounds ridiculous right? Like how hard is to pick out an outfit, do your hair, and put makeup on. Have you ever noticed that depending on what you look like on any given day that it has a major impact on your day. When I take the time to look the way I’m feeling my days tend to go better. I tackle my job on more confident note and I feel better about myself in general. 

Morale of this ridiculous story Is be who want to be and look whatever you want! Don’t let judgment or fear stop who you want to be! 

The only downside? Takes effort and there’s not enough closet space 😩

Hot Mess

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Today’s post is short & to the point ladies!

Do you ever feel like you have everything under control? Then do you only realize that you don’t have shit under control and you are the definition of a hot mess?

I feel like I wake up every morning ready to tackle everything that falls under work & motherhood but that on most days I will fall short somewhere. Any idea where I tend to fall short? You got it ! Motherhood! How is that I can be more focused, in control and on my A game in my career but with Motherhood (which is supposed to be easy because of maternal instincts) I seem to find a way to mess it up everyday? At work I have to do lists, deadlines and priories… somehow I remember it needs to be done and It gets done. At home I go to leave the house with my son and I forget to bring his lunch, or I forget my keys inside. How does that even happen? How do you leave your house without your keys?

I wasn’t always like this. When my son was first born I had everything in my total control. I was a breastfeeding champ, my son loved to cuddle with me, I somehow found time to nap, clean, and do piles of laundry all the while still giving him my undivided attention. But lets fast forward to two years later… my house is in a constant state of filth, I wait till the last minute to do laundry, there are toys scattered every where, and dishes pile in the sink until I load the dishwasher. Even though I neglect my household chores until the last possible second I still feel like I don’t give my son the attention he got as an infant.

By the time I get home from being stuck in traffic and getting my son its usually 6:30pm. Then its time for some dinner (after I make it) some cuddle time on the couch, a bottle and a bedtime book. He’s in bed by 8pm and I follow shortly after. It’s like the energy has been sucked out of me and all I need to do is lay down.

When I think about my childhood I try to remember what it was like for my mom. My mom worked two jobs, made dinner, did the dishes, cleaned the house, and paid the bills without an ounce of help from my sister and I. I mean how the hell did she do it? We grew up in a spotless house, not a single thing was out of place ever. I remember still being in high school and getting ready in the morning; by the time I got out of the shower my mom would have made my bed and eaten breakfast. Then there’s me. I don’t even have the energy to make my bed a few times a week. What the hell am I doing wrong? Is this normal?

Feeling like you don’t have everything under control and that you are somehow failing your child is one of the worst feelings that I have ever experienced. Any other moms out there going through the same thing? I can not be the only in the madness!

 

Mom Bod

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What is Beauty? Beauty is defined as the quality or aggregate of qualities in a person or thing that gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit.

If Beauty is defined as the quality in a person that gives pleasure to the senses then why do we question our worth on this?

I don’t know about you but I have struggled with body image (beauty) for as long as I can remember. It all started in early elementary school when I was a bit bigger than most girls my age, then it carried on to the same in middle school and my first year of high school. We all know that kids can be rough, not just physically but also emotionally. “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.” is total bullshit.  Words create craters in one’s spirit that sometimes never heal.

I’ll never forget my sophomore year of high school. I finally had a boyfriend and hang on ladies get this he was a junior! I felt like I was on top of the world. However as quick as that began it quickly ended. It ended because I was 15 and not ready to take the biggest step a girl decides to take. Sadly he had cheated on me with someone who would. I’m sure you’re thinking that something like this happens to every girl and you know what you may be right! Every girl might go through the same thing. However there is this thing called DNA and that shapes who we are and with that we respond differently to different situations. This my friends is what makes us unique. After the tumbleweed of years where you don’t feel good enough I took a spiral down the rabbit hole.

I decided changing my appearance would fix everything. It started with eating less and starting to exercise. All you basically need to do when you’re a teen right? From that I lost some weight; I can still remember the feeling of getting on the scale and being lighter. Its like this high of feeling accomplished and feeling better about yourself. That high is addicting. So I ate a little less, exercised a little more. I continued this cycle until I would eat lettuce bare and workout for 2 hours a day. The compliments were amazing, the feeling was amazing so I just kept going. There would be days I wouldn’t even eat a thing. I got down to 103 lbs. I had no boobs, no ass, no shape whatsoever but I was thin.

The next moment of this I will never forget. My sister who is six years older than me finally picked up that something was wrong. I’ll never forget her yelling at me and forcing me to eat something before leaving the house to head to a concert. Later that night I threw it up everything she made me eat. She kept close watch on me; every day she would monitor my food in take. I was so fearful of gaining weight so I did what I thought was the next possible step. I just kept throwing up when no one was around. So funny little thing about my sister…she apparently is Sherlock freaking Holmes. She caught on to my sneaking away escapades. I won’t continue all the details of recovery but my sister was amazing and helped me get back to “normal”. To be honest though I  don’t think one is ever fully recovered or normal from events much like these.

Now onto the Mom Bod. How did you feel when you found out you were pregnant? Elated, happy, scared, nervous, excited, hopeful? I’m sure there are a number of emotions/ words you all felt. Did anyone else feel fear of gaining weight? I know I did. It makes me feel terrible to this day that I felt that way. After that initial reaction I of course was so happy. I can still remember the feeling I got during my first Ultrasound 🙂 but we will save that for another blog. Throughout my pregnancy I made sure to eat a balanced diet and I monitored my weight daily. I was a slave to the scale. I gained 25 lbs and all everyone said was you look great pregnant! After my son was born I was one of the fortunate mothers that lost all the weight and more due to breastfeeding and healthy eating. I was the happiest I had been throughout my entire life, I was thin, had an amazing baby boy who stole my heart right from the beginning, an amazing job and great support from family and friends. Seriously I didn’t think life could be any better. It was after the breastfeeding stopped a year later that my weight anxiety came back because my weight began to fluctuate. So began the yo yo dieting that I’ve done for years and that became my life again. Once the weight gain started and the anxiety set in I noticed the stretch marks my little man gave me and I noticed how my breasts no longer looked the same.. They just look like deflated balloons. It’s terrible! It took over my life all over again and with that it took away some of the joy of motherhood.

So back to my original question… why do we pressure ourselves? why do value our worth on beauty?

I have a son that loves me for me but I still question my value based on the number that is on that scale. My belief is that from the teasing we endure as children, the media portraying airbrushed women, the  pressure to not have a mom bod, and the scrutiny we put on each other  is what has made life and honestly motherhood not as enjoyable as it could be. We stress about the things that do not make us beautiful. What truly makes us beautiful and extraordinary is who we are and what we do with our life. I’m not saying that I remember this everyday because I sure as hell don’t. I spent 15 minutes crying this morning while getting ready for work because I didn’t like the number on the scale and I thought my ass looked huge. Even through those bad moments where we cry and beat our selves up we need to try to rise above it.

So what I ask is that when you are done reading this blog post (hopefully you did read the whole thing) spend your day tomorrow complementing each other. Whether it is saying something nice about someone’s shoes, outfit, makeup, hair, laugh, smile, body or personality. Just say it and I hope that someone does that to you in return. We truly are all beautiful so lets work together to remind each other of that!

 

 

Have Another

Hi Everyone!

Hopefully you all are relaxing with a glass of wine or a beer! I just got home from work about an hour ago and I just wanted to have a quick chat…

I wanted to talk about a topic that truly pisses me off. Have you moms or dads ever had someone ask you when you are going to have another child? Or maybe you’ve been asked if you’re going to have one at all! I don’t know about you but I personally feel that it is truly no ones damn business whether or not I’m going to decide to have another child.

Over the past several months this has truly been a topic of discussion among friends and family. “Jenny when are you going to give Brayden a baby brother or sister” or “Jenny you know you can’t only have one child,  Brayden will be lonely.”

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So first of all there is nothing wrong with having a child be an only child. Honestly an only child might actually get more love and support from a parent because there is no brother or sister to divide attention with. Let’s be honest here there is only so much time and love you can give in one day so dividing it evenly must be a project.  Secondly what if I as a parent just don’t want to be pregnant or give birth again. If you’ve been pregnant and have given birth you know what I mean… there are some glorious parts for sure but it’s also extremely disgusting and oh ya did I mention painful! 

I became a mother at 25…I know what you’re thinking, that 25 isn’t that young. In my opinion that is where you’re wrong. Sure it’s not like I was 17 or 18 but at 25 I still had a lot of life to live before becoming a mother. My son is definitely the best and most important thing in my life but I would also like to live parts of my life that I missed when I was 25. I could afford to give my son more if he is an only child, I could spend more time with him, I could travel him with easier to places all around the world, we could have a better chance at having a bond that can’t be broken. I know I know there are probably some eye rolls from some of you reading this because you think I’m a bad mom for saying that. Well guess what? I’m not. I’m just a woman who wants to enjoy the one life she gets to live with her amazing son the way that she wants to. For the record having another child is not out of the question for me, it just isn’t in my immediate future and the only person that will decide if/ when I have another one is me. So for the love of God stop asking me when I will be expanding my family. When I figure it out I’ll make sure you’re on speed dial so I can tell you! 

Now lets move on to the next part of this equation. Why do others feel the need to ask a woman, man or couple when they are going to have a child? Listen I can totally understand a mother asking her married daughter or son like once maybe twice. The difference is to  hound anyone family or not about a ticking maternal time clock is just messed up. How do you know whether or not that couple has been trying but they have been unable to conceive? Or maybe that couple has a condition where they can not have children. I once was helping someone find information on fertility at work… so I helped her find exactly what she needed. She then proceeded to open up to me about how difficult of a time emotionally it has been for her and her husband. She spoke to me about how her family has been pressuring her but they don’t have the slightest idea that they are struggling. I felt so terrible for her so I did what any person should do. I let her vent it out to me and was there to just be an ear. It was the least I could do for her but what she did for me was much more. She truly helped me realize how there are no limits to what the public asks or says and that the impact can truly be damaging.

So lets just set this record straight don’t constantly ask women, men or couples about how many children they are going to have or when they are going to start trying because time is ticking quickly. 

If you have ever experienced anything like this please share your experience! It’s about time our frustrated voices are heard on such an emotional topic. 

Dreadful Mondays

Hello Hello Hello! Is this thing on?

Anyways, now that you probably think I am THE mom with THE #momjokes! Let’s chat!

Mondays are the day we all completely dread the most right? Normally I wouldn’t agree with you… normally I would be praising those above for bringing me Monday. Why do you ask? I’ll tell you why. CHILD CARE! I get to drop my little peanut whom I love dearly off at his sitters house while I get an hour ride to work to either jam out in my car or listen to my latest audiobook.

This Monday though, I was dreading going back to that work life. Only because it was the first weekend where I wasn’t a mom full time and I got to be free with a side of some fun. On Friday evening I traveled into the big NYC to go visit a Toy Fair. Sounds pretty cool right? I was able to  see all these amazing new toys to be released in 2017 before they hit the shelves. Yes this is relevant to my job. It wasn’t a spur the moment idea, I knew I was going well over a month in advance. Anyways all day Saturday I was able to see new releases, meet dorks much like myself, and try to score some free swag. *hint* if you or anyone in your family is a Lego fan you will not be disappointed this year with what is going to be released. 

After my exciting Saturday day time is was time to paint the city red. That’s the phrase right?
I started at Cafe Lalo at around 4pm. You probably think this was like an early dinner… nope it was time for a latte and well a gigantic piece of Oreo cake because when there isn’t a kid around to pick at the good food you want to enjoy every calorie possible, even though you’ll regret it later. Dessert comes first in my book. Let’s talk about this cafe for a minute. It is the cutest cafe I have ever been to and it was packed to the brim with people that had the same idea. I ordered a caramel latte and it was hands down the best latte of my life. The cake wasn’t too shabby either! img_0090

So here’s what Saturday night looked like: Went to a pub and had some amazing food. Obviously this place wasn’t a five star restaurant  but let me tell you, I had the best damn burger I’ve had in a long time with  a side order of my favorite sweet potato fries. I don’t know how all of you feel but sometimes a big greasy burger and fries is exactly what you need when you’re feeling WILD! ha Paired with that burger was a tall glass of bone dry hard cider (as you can tell I was totally living it up) in all honesty it did pair perfectly with dinner. This was the first time I have gone out to dinner without my son since September. For the record I was away from my son in September because I was at a work conference in Florida. So after dinner it was decided to continue the night by bar hopping and enjoying some beers with some great company. *hint* to moms going out for the first time in a long time, check your outfit so you don’t actually look like a mom. Learn from my mistake. Back to the story, two beers in (yes I am a light weight) and I was on top of the world! At the second Bar I met some people from Maryland (I don’t even have a clue what their names were).. they were most certainly a strange group. It was a group mixed of couples that were completely trashed and dancing it up like it was the last day to party, so naturally I did the same and danced my ass off. On the other side of me there was another couple which I later found out where just friends out on Saturday night. These two were my favorite!!!! The woman was drinking straight whiskey which basically acted like a truth serum. SCORE! That totally means a good time, I truly couldn’t tell what the man was drinking but he looked half in the bag as well. Anyways she started talking to us about how they just saw Lala land.

(This is not a paid review of Lala land) Her review of Lala land was that you need to smoke weed or get drunk before you go watch it and that it was the worst relationship movie ever. She stated it was completely unrealistic. If you loved Lala land sorry for this intense review.. I can’t formulate my own opinion seeing as I haven’t been to the movies since I was 9 months pregnant 😦

After hearing that sparkling review I quickly became fond of talking to this woman, she was a complete riot! My new friends then proceeded to buy me a shot of whiskey and I was totally done for after that. Two beers+ one shot+ a mom who never drinks = drunk mom in NYC. Woke up Sunday feeling like complete garbage and I woke up missing my son.The exciting story pretty much ends there since I got on a train to head back home to my little man. And some of you may be thinking this really wasn’t much of a weekend out.. for me it was. I spend hours upon hours developing people at work and then hours upon hours developing my son to be a great man. For one weekend I got to feel what it was like again to go out meet strangers and just a be a 28 year old woman!

so this is my Monday blue post.. *waves* Bye to the weekend and back to reality.